


Turn Around Three Times and Lay Down

by ladyshadowdrake



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Capwolf, Cool, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, M/M, SO MUCH FLUFF, cat!Tony, humans to animal transformation, so I'm a cat and I'm not on earth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-05-15 23:08:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 20,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14799723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyshadowdrake/pseuds/ladyshadowdrake
Summary: Tony and Steve take a tumble through a portal of inky darkness. When they wake up, they're not exactly feeling like themselves.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MidNightTiger](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidNightTiger/gifts).



> My 2018 Cap-Iron Man Reverse Big Bang entry, partnered with the lovely MidNightTiger, who drew some fantastic art!!
> 
> I suppose it will surprise absolutely no one, but I am just finishing this, so it hasn't been beta'ed yet. There will be mistakes, my apologies! I will be editing in the next few days.

“This looks like something Bugs Bunny drew on the ground,” Steve said, crouched down in the street to peer into the blackness on the sidewalk. It was an _absence_ , and everything about it was gut twistingly, skin searingly wrong. It made his teeth hurt and his joints ache, but he couldn’t look away.

“Might not be anything,” Tony said. “There’s paint so dark that it absorbs damn near 100% of light.”

Bruce snorted. “I’d believe Anish Kapoor as a supervillain.”

Steve made an uncertain noise in the back of his throat. He’d been the first on scene, and the only one staring into that terrible darkness in person. Almost unwillingly, he stretched close to the abyss to grab a rock from the sidewalk, and then chucked it underhand into the perfectly round pit of darkness. It vanished silently into the pit as if it had never existed.

Holding a hand up to his ear to protect the comm device from the wind, he said, “Definitely not paint.”

A scream echoed behind him, and Steve was moving before he’d even consciously registered the sound. He twisted with the shield up to protect his head and saw half a dozen of the curious onlookers scrambling away from the opposite sidewalk. Another puddle of blackness spread quickly away from the gutter and into the street. As Steve watched, the darkness swallowed up a mailbox. It fell as quickly and silently as the rock had earlier.

“Cap, behind you!”

Steve twisted again immediately, but saw nothing except a red and gold blur a moment before a sharp impact drove him backwards. He and Tony rolled into the street in a tangle of clanging metal, and came to rest less than a foot from the spreading nothingness. Cursing, Steve rolled them away. The Iron Man armor was hard to move when Tony wasn’t being helpful, even for Steve. He only managed to roll over the armor and tug it after him, leaving Tony’s weight mostly on his chest.

Tony was back on his feet in an instant. Steve followed, but before he could vent the pressure building up in the back of his skull, Tony pointed at the original circle of darkness. It had spilled over the curb and into the street where Steve had been standing.

Temper deflating, Steve tried to dismiss the storm of annoyance. He gave Tony a nod of acknowledgement, and Tony nodded back without a word. Normally so graceful in the suit, he looked stiff as he turned away from the swelling pools of nothingness. Steve expected him to hover around the strange tears in reality, but Tony turned away from both of them and walked away to wave the gathered gawkers further back.

A moment later, Thor landed in the street with a rush of wind, startling Steve into a half turn. Noticing the flinch, Thor set his giant hand on Steve’s shoulder and tilted his chin down slightly. His voice lowered below his customary boom. “Are you well, my friend?”

Steve nodded. “On edge,” he admitted with a gesture to the inky blackness eating the street. “You ever seen anything like this?”

Thor’s brows furrowed deeply over the bridge of his nose, and he crouched down to peer into it. “My brother might be able to guess the origin of this, but it is far beyond me. I only took portaling as an elective for a season, and I was never good at it,” he said, standing back up. Getting lost in his own thoughts, he crossed his arms over his chest and frowned into the darkness. “It is deeply troubling.”

“You don’t say,” Steve muttered, trying and failing to pull his eyes away from the hypnotic darkness.

“I did just say,” Thor pointed out with a wide grin, instantly breaking out of whatever mood he’d fallen into. He gave Steve a friendly jostle, and then chucked him hard enough on the shoulder to bruise. “Fear not! We have some of the best minds in this realm gathering here as we speak.”

Steve summoned up a smile for Thor, but the quinjet _fwoomed_ overhead before he had to come up with a rejoinder. The jet landed in the nearest intersection, Clint performing a crazy spiral to fit into the residential street.

Despite the earlier scare the spreading puddle had given some of the bystanders, there were still crowds of people pressing up against the relocated police barricades. As Steve watched, a trio of snickering boys took baseballs out of their hoodie pockets, waited until the nearest officer had looked away, and threw them over his head. Steve stepped forward and deflected two of the balls off the curve of the shield, sending them sailing back over the crowd to a spattering of startled applause.

The third ball just barely escaped his reach, hitting the ground by his left boot and shooting up behind him. He twisted to follow its progress, but Tony snagged the ball out of the air and fired his thrusters to bring it back to the boys. Steve saw the kids obviously struggling between cowering away from Iron Man as he hovered a few feet above the pavement, and gaping at him in awe.

“Let’s not throw balls at possibly-alien holes of nothingness anymore, hm?” Tony suggested. He tossed the ball back, and the tallest of the kids belated caught it inches from his nose. Tony gave them a brief salute and the kids fled, fighting over the ball as they darted out of the crowd.

Tony thumped down to the pavement, showboating for the appreciative audience. Steve rolled his eyes as he turned away from the display. A moment later, he heard Iron Man’s heavy steps behind him, and turned just enough to catch the flashy suit of armor in his peripheral vision.

“Having fun?”

“Always,” Tony quipped, giving Steve a backwards wave on his way back to the first of the black puddles. He stopped just at the edge, and seemed to just stare at it. His shoulders were tilted opposite to his hips, and the set of his helmet suggested he was trying to look away.

Steve knew that Tony was probably just running scans, but an uncomfortable tingle lodged in his spine and wouldn’t be moved, no matter how much he rolled his shoulders. He turned away from the unsettling darkness to greet the rest of his team as they unloaded from the Quinjet.

~*~

Tony tried not to stare into the darkness as Jarvis compiled data. There wasn’t much that scans could tell him except for everything they _couldn’t_ tell him. The temperature at the center of the anomaly was so low that he couldn’t measure it from the suit, and yet the temperature within centimeters of the anomaly’s perimeter was only fractions of a degree cooler than the air sixty feet away. The depth couldn’t be measured, and Tony didn’t have instruments sensitive enough to measure how much – if any – light was being reflected by the surface. For that matter, Tony wasn’t entirely sure it _had_ a surface.

“Anything interesting in there?” Bruce asked in a very carefully neutral voice.

Tony let his breath out slowly so he wouldn’t snap at Bruce. It wasn’t Bruce’s fault that looking into that impenetrable darkness had driven Tony’s heart rate up until he could hear it thumping against his ear drums. He cleared his throat and reported all the findings he didn’t have. His own voice came out so softly from lack of air that he had to clear his throat to repeat himself. Bruce kindly did not ask how he was handling it, and Tony tried to pretend that he was handling it just fine.

An alarm went off, and Tony whirled toward the source, automatically backing away from the slowly growing puddle of void at his feet. A burst of wind thundered down the street, screaming against the closely packed townhouses. He crossed his arms over his face on instinct, and felt his stabilizers flaring behind him as the wind smacked into him with sledgehammer force. Behind him, civilians screamed as the wind picked people up off their feet and threw them into the street.

“Get these people out of here!” Steve shouted over the wind, but Clint and Natasha’s responses were barely more than blips in response.

Natasha turned into the wind and used the gust to carry her over the smaller of the two pools. Tony automatically held out a hand for her to catch, and they both stumbled backwards several feet before Natasha planted her heels on Tony’s hip and launched upwards. Tony wouldn’t have heard her whoop of pleasure if he didn’t have filters working overtime to cancel out the wind noise.

No less happy to be flying through the air, Clint put the wind to his back and ran full-tilt with it pushing him along. He just barely made it over the larger pool, and then caught a lamp-post to change his direction. Tony managed a smile and with his rolling eyes, and turned his attention back to Steve. He had both feet firmly planted and his shield out in front of him, but the wind was steadily pushing him backwards. Another dozen yards, and he would be tumbling into the blackness.

“Watch your six, Cap,” Tony warned. He wished Steve would just get onto the opposite side of the dangerous puddle of _Here Be Madness_.

“I’m aware, Iron Man,” Steve gritted out. He leaned into the wind, dropped down to one knee to lower his profile, and hunched down behind the shield. His backwards process slowed and the shield softened the shriek of the sudden gale over his comm line. “Thor, where is the wind coming from?”

High up in the air, Thor sounded cheerful as he shouted back, “I know not, but it is a grand storm!”

“Like an overgrown golden retriever chasing the sprinkler,” Tony muttered.

Steve wobbled at a sharp burst of wind, and lost another foot of ground, but was apparently determined to keep his position. Meanwhile, trash flew by at speeds that made even the crumpled bits of paper dangerous. The crowd, at least, had willingly yielded to suggestions to run.

Pressing the edge of the shield into the ground, Steve steadied himself. “Is it the covering the whole city?”

“No! I am but two blocks to your north, and the air is as calm as a babe’s sleeping breath. I will see if I cannot discover its source. Are you in danger on the ground?”

“Not yet,” Tony broke in, but his eyes were glued to the shrinking margin between Steve’s right foot and the darkness. The space between the two pools was shrinking even faster. Another few minutes, and they would connect into a river of void.

“I will be swift,” Thor promised.

Tony calculated the force of the wind, the distance to Steve, and how long he had before the reaching tendrils of darkness met. The wind speed was hovering at just under 40 mph, with sharp gusts shooting up over 50 mph. In theory, the thrusters wouldn’t start having trouble keeping up until the wind speed got closer to 100 mph, but he hadn’t been able to test it above 80 in the field.

“There is some manner of portal here,” Thor announced. “It is certainly the source of the wind.” He sighed heavily. “And smacks of my brother’s magic.”

Curses sounded over the comms, garbled by the wind.

“Cap, maybe you could get over that puddle of death and darkness?” Tony suggested. “I’d feel a lot better if you were on this side of it.”

“Well, if it will make _you_ feel better,” Steve said, but he twisted to look behind him, and then shifted his weight in anticipation of a jump.

Tony eased himself sideways to be out of the way, but close enough to catch him if needed. Steve pressed the edge of the shield into the ground and vaulted upwards. Without the wind, it would have been an impressive leap, but with an 80 mph gust shooting up underneath him, it looked like he’d taken flight. Tony cursed and fired his thrusters to catch up. As if it were a sentient thing, the wind gusted at his knees to knock him sideways, and then another pushed him downwards with such force that he hit the pavement faceplate first.

A moment later, Steve came slamming down after him and disappeared into the inky blackness without causing so much as ripple. Not even stopping to think of how much of a _bad bad_ **_bad_** idea it was, Tony scrambled after him.


	2. Chapter One

Steve couldn’t feel his lungs expanding. He couldn’t feel air around him, pressure against him, or a sense of falling. There was no up, down, or sideways. He flailed his arms and legs, but there was nothing around him for purchase. He squeezed his eyes shut, and then opened them so wide that they hurt. The blackness was so complete that he couldn’t be sure that they were really open.

“Anyone there?” Steve gasped out. There was no response. His own voice sounded like it was smothered with a dozen layers of wool. He sucked in a breath, and then another. No movement, no sound, no change in temperature. Maybe he was dead. Maybe death was just this disembodied non-existence until the end of time.

A chill spread out around his hips. He had a moment to think he’d managed to wet himself, and then a moment to be so relieved to be feeling anything that wetting himself seemed like the best thing that had ever happened to him, and then chill spread up his torso and down his legs. Pressure grabbed him around the base of the spine and pulled down sharply. The world exploded into sound and color and light. He screamed, and was abruptly plummeting through empty air being buffeted by wind. Icy cold rain hit him sideways as he fell through the darkness. This, at least, was just normal darkness. Night time darkness, with depth and dimension, and the occasional bright flicker of lightning.

A hard impact against his side made him gasp in a wet breath. Hard coils wrapped around his neck and waist. He flung one arm out to struggle free as he tumbled with the new weight wrapped around him, and then twisted to bring the shield to bear.

“Iron Man?” Steve shouted to be heard over the rain. “What are you doing?”

The faceplate popped open and Tony’s lips moved, but Steve couldn’t hear a word. He tried to make himself a smaller package, sinking against Tony’s chest. He pulled the shield in tight, and Tony snapped the faceplate down. Steve felt a brief upward movement, and then a twist in the wind sent them into a tumbling spiral. Steve was torn out of Tony’s fingers, and dropped downward like he’d been caught in a vacuum.

Tony disappeared in the swirling darkness, and Steve hit water on his back. He felt his lungs seize, and his hands searched for the plane’s controls while a voice in the back of his head gibbered in terror. He barely sucked in a breath before a wave crashed over his head.

~*~

When Tony woke, the first thing he noticed was the ache in his joints. He groaned, and it came out as a low _yroawl_. His throat was on fire, and his face felt itchy. He coughed and blinked several times, trying to get Jarvis’ attention, but the HUD remained dark. None of his limbs seemed to be working correctly. He tried to get to his knees, but his arms felt suddenly too long, his feet were too small, and he couldn’t balance correctly.

“Cap?” he called, or _tried to_. What he managed was _aouoo._ He shook his head to dispel the fog filling up his skull, and ended up unbalancing himself straight back to the ground. Feeling woozy and more than a little annoyed, he clawed at the faceplate. The helmet folded back into the cowl, and he felt better almost immediately. He hadn’t even noticed how much pressure the helmet had been putting on his skull until it was gone. A sneeze caught him by surprise and set his head to pounding.

Tony tried to rub at his face, but nothing seemed to be in the right place. Instead of rubbing his right eye, he hit his nose, leaving a stinging scratch. He hissed at the sudden pain, and then froze. The sound hadn’t been a sharp exhalation of breath, it had been a _hiss_. He could still feel it reverberating in his chest. Looking down, he saw the panels of the suit going down his arms, but they were at the wrong angle, and they tapered down to paws.

People didn’t have paws. Tony was a human and shouldn’t have paws. The skin all the way down his spine tingled, and his face itched, and his tail lashed out.

People also didn’t have tails.

Tony twisted to look at it, gaping as the thing swung around with a mind of its own. It was clad in armor plating, long and slender, and now that he knew it was there, he was aware of exactly how uncomfortable it was in the armor plating.

 _Okay_ , he thought, plopping his ass down on the ground and trying to ignore the swish of his tail. _I’m a cat. This is fine. Cats are great. I like cats._

A pained whimper made him automatically drop to his belly. His ears pricked forward to track the sound, and his tail went very still. For the first time, Tony took in his surroundings. The sky was a pale blue-gray, he was in grass that went over his head while he was crouched down, and surrounded by dark trees. The air smelled wet and sharp like ozone, and two faint shapes of moons were visible just over the trees.

_Not Earth, then. I’m a cat, and I’m not on Earth. This is totally fine._

There was a scrape of movement, and then a high pitched whine. Whatever it was, it was hurt, and probably bigger than Tony-the-freaking-cat, and it might want to eat him, armor and all. He tried to get the faceplate back up, but he couldn’t get his paws to reach between his shoulder blades. His pulse leapt up, and he dropped his mouth open to pant. Meanwhile, his back legs started to tingle with tension. Running would be a good idea if he knew what was out there, or how to run on four legs for that matter.

Something big crashed through the brush to his left, and Tony was moving almost before he’d registered the noise. Paws digging into the damp soil, he sprang out of his hiding place and made a run for the trees. He’d never moved so fast in his life. For a moment, he forgot that he was running for his life and relished in the coordination and fluidity of his feline body. The moment he recognized how coordinated he was feeling, he promptly went tumbling tail-over-whiskers into the grass. His feet were quickly tangled up, and he lost track of which limb went where.

Finally sprawling out on his stomach, Tony listened for sounds of pursuit. The clearing was quiet except for insect noises and the labored panting of whatever he’d run from. Whatever it was, it was obviously hurt too badly to chase to him. Charging off blindly into an alien forest wouldn’t help him, and he still needed to find Steve. Thor had said the wind portal “smacked” of Loki’s magic, and Steve and Tony had fallen into some kind of portal themselves.

Okay, _Steve_ had fallen in. Tony had jumped in, because he was stupid.

Loki was a master of shape shifting and illusion. Maybe Tony only just _thought_ he was a cat. He tried to laugh, but it came out as a pleasant chuffing sound that tickled his nose.

Questioning his own perception of reality was probably a good way to make himself go crazy, so he would just need to accept that he was a cat, on an alien planet that had two moons, and find Steve so they could figure out a way to get home. As soon as he did get home, he was going to open up Loki’s stomach and eat his entrails.

_Great, I just grossed myself out. Lovely._

There was another whine from the clearing that sounded almost more frustrated than pained. Tony’s ears flattened to his head, and he did his best to make himself very small in the grass.

It took an embarrassingly long time to occur to him that if he was a cat, Steve might also be a cat. Or at least a something that wasn’t a human with opposable thumbs. Moving very slowly, he poked his head up over the grass. The sky had grown light enough to make out more details of the clearing. Everything was a very dull color, and all of the vegetation in the area was blue or gray. If nothing else, the lack of color made the giant form of the dog stand out.

Tony automatically dropped back into the grass, heart hammering, and then made himself look up again. The dog was laying on its side, and obviously still breathing. It had a great mane of pale, fluffy fur around its neck, but the rest of its body was a darker color, and the fur was shorter. It also had a strange pattern of vertical stripes down one side.

The dog shifted in an apparently futile attempt to get up, and Tony realized that it didn’t have dark, strangely striped fur. It was wearing a shirt with alternating dark and light stripes on the lower hem. Tony bounded out of the grass and ran across the clearing.

“Steve!” he shouted as he got close, though it came out _Meouu!_

Steve twisted, saw him coming, and snarled. Tony slammed all four paws down and hopped awkwardly sideways as the snarl turned into a growl, and that turned into a deafening bark. Steve struggled again to stand, but ended up in a heap in the grass. He growled non-stop, showing his teeth in a display that made Tony’s fur stand on end and his guts get a bit wobbly.

“Steve, it’s me!” Tony tried to say, which just came out in a string of high pitched cat noises.

Steve barked at him again, wiggling forward on his belly to snap at Tony’s paws. Tony bounded back. His entire body trembled with the desire to run, but he made himself stay. Up close, he could see Steve’s problem. Like Tony’s suit, Steve’s uniform had come along with him, but Tony’s suit was designed with interlocking plates, and that design had apparently carried over. Steve’s uniform was still made of cloth, and apparently the size and general shape had just changed to his suit his canine form. The pants probably would have been fine if he were walking upright on his hind legs. Down on all fours, the cloth was bunching up in his hips to prevent him from standing on all fours. Based on the bulge in the back, Tony guess that his tail was also trapped in the fabric. He noted curiously that shield was attached to the magnetic harness and wondered how Steve had gotten it there.

Tony hopped up onto a boulder to get out of the range of Steve’s teeth, and Steve made a frustrated noise. He rolled onto his back and wiggled frantically, but the belt was holding the pants firmly in place. He started making the most pitiful yammering dog noises that Tony had ever heard. It reminded him of a husky. Tony laughed again, unable to help himself, and Steve’s ears twisted around at the chuffing.

Steve snarled and snapped his teeth up at Tony before returning to wiggling on the ground.

“I can help you with that if you promise not to eat me,” Tony tried.

Steve snarled something in response, but he’d stopped squirming and eyed Tony speculatively. Tony abruptly remembered that dogs didn’t have full color vision, so maybe Tony just looked like a cat. He wracked his brain trying to remember if cats did, but it had never been a particular interest to him, just trivia. He looked around the clearing again, but he couldn’t definitively say what colors he could see when they were on an alien planet. For all he knew, there was no red on this planet.

Tony’s ears went back in annoyance at himself. He didn’t know if the planet had red, but he had the evidence right in front of his face that he couldn’t see it. Steve’s stripes looked white and brown. He looked down at himself and saw brown interlocking panels with yellow accents. Yowling to get Steve’s attention, he slowly shifted his weight so he was balanced on his back legs, and reached his arms out.

Steve’s ears swiveled, and he cocked his head. Sounding hesitant, he said, “Wuff.”

“Wuff,” Tony repeated sarcastically, which sounded like _wouwwf_.

Steve’s ears went back, and then he turned away from Tony and resumed trying to get his pants off, paws scrabbling uselessly in an attempt to get to the belt.

Watching Steve carefully, Tony descended from his boulder. Steve’s ears followed his motion, but his lips stayed firmly over his teeth, and he didn’t snarl when Tony got closer. He tried to squirm away when Tony reached a paw out for his belt, but Tony swatted him on the chest. In reply, Steve snapped at tail. Reacting automatically, Tony swiped his face, and they both sprung away from each other – Tony more gracefully than Steve.

Ears back and tail swishing rapidly through the wet grass, Tony glared at Steve. Sitting up in an awkward hunch, Steve glared back.

 _Just like the helicarrier all over again,_ Tony thought, bitter and resentful even in his own ears. _Stubborn, self-righteous ass!_

 _Funny that you think you ever get to call_ anyone _stubborn,_ Steve shot back.

They both froze and stared at each other, ears slowly rotating forward. _Steve?_

_…Tony?_

_Great. Now I get to have you as the_ literal _voice in my head,_ Tony complained. He felt his chest warming with a faint growl, and his spine curling up.

_I’m not a whole lot happier about it, pal!_

Tony tried to roll his eyes with middling success. He huffed out a sigh. _Just sit still so I can get you out of those ridiculous pants. I guess we’ve answered the age-old question of which way a dog would wear pants._

 _Not very well?_ Steve suggested sarcastically, but he flopped onto his back and held still so Tony could get to his belt.

Chewing on tactical webbing was strangely pleasant, and Tony got lost for a few seconds with just gnawing on it before Steve’s complaints reminded him that he was supposed to be doing something with it. Climbing onto Steve’s belly, he managed to get the belt buckle open, and then grabbed it in his mouth and pulled backwards while Steve rolled over until it came free. Getting the button undone was decidedly more difficult, and Tony’s jaw hurt by the time he was wrenching the zipper open.

Freed from the closures, Steve promptly started to wiggle again. Tony was unseated by the motion, and hissed in reproach as he tumbled back to the ground. Whining and yipping, Steve managed to kick himself free. As soon as his tail popped loose, he tried to jump up, made it one stride on what looked like an attempt at a victory lamp, and face-planted back into the grass, the pants still tangled around his ankles.

Tony yowled with laughter. He felt his tail go up for the first time, curling up at the top in an expression of pleasure. Not half so pleased, Steve snarled at him again. He twisted around and started tearing at the fabric with his teeth. Tony suspected that he started having fun about half way through, growling and shaking his head to tear at the seams. Tony probably could have helped, but he was tired, and not interested in getting in between Steve and his chew toy.

Hopping back up to his boulder, he found a sunny spot and decided to take a break while Steve got himself loose.

~*~

By the time Steve got free of the confines of the pants, all he could do for a while was a run and run and run. He didn’t stop running circles around the grassy clearing until he was so out of breath that he couldn’t keep his tongue in his mouth. He looked around curiously. The sun was far overhead, and he thought it had just been morning when Tony (the cat – Tony was a cat) had found him. It looked closer to afternoon now, which made Steve cock his head in confusion. He couldn’t have been running for _that_ long. He’d just made some laps, and chased that rabbit for a while, and barked at that stupid squirrel taunting him from the trees, and rolled in the grass.

“Tony?” he called, which came out _au-wuff_. His ears twitched back and forth, and his tail drifted slowly downward. He was not in New York, and he was a _dog_. Whatever that inky pit of blackness was, it must have transformed him into these animal bodies. Which just left the important question of where they were, and how the hell they were going to get back.

“Tony!” he barked again, a knot of worry tightening in his insides. What if he’d scared Tony off? What if Tony had wandered off and gotten eaten by something while Steve had been obliviously chasing small woodland creatures?

_I swear, if you’ve just left me here…._

_Calm down, Cap,_ Tony answered. His voice was somehow still Tony, but it came along with a prickly sensation at the back of Steve’s neck.

Steve shook his head violently to dispel the tingles. He looked around the clearing again, and found Tony lounging on the tumble of big boulders in the middle, his tail swishing lazily in the air.

 _Enjoying your nap?_ Steve asked.

 _Done with your run?_ Tony replied. Steve sensed that he’d meant to it to be sarcastic and cutting, but he was obviously too sleepy to put much effort into in it. Instead, he sounded blithely unconcerned, and so comfortable that Steve found himself inching closer to the rock, though what he planned to do when he got there was beyond him.

Yawning hugely, Tony sat upright. He took a moment to pat at the armor plating on either arm, resettling some of the overlapping sheets, and then descended gracefully down the rock face with his tail up. He stretched luxuriously down at the bottom, upper body completely disappearing into the grass so that only his armor-plated ass and tail were visible.

 _Show off_ , Steve groused.

 _Jealous_ , Tony returned.

Steve didn’t think that dogs could blush, but ducking his head low so his jaw rested on his chest produced the same uncomfortable feeling in his stomach. He resisted the sudden urge to whine.

 _I haven’t slept that long in years,_ Tony commented when he straightened up, but he didn’t wait for Steve’s response. _So, what are going to do, Cap? I don’t suppose you spent that run thinking of a plan._

Steve’s ears drooped, and his jaw hit his chest again. This time, he couldn’t stop the whine that rattled high in his throat. He _should_ have spent the run thinking of a plan. He shouldn’t have done any running at all. He shouldn’t have stubbornly stayed on the wrong side of that portal for so long, sure that someone or something was trying to achieve exactly that, and not wanting to be off-footed.

 _Well,_ Tony said, interrupting Steve’s miserable spiral, _Let’s start moving. Maybe we can at least find out what planet we’re on._

Ears pricking up, Steve demanded, _Planet?_

Tony’s head cocked slightly to the side, and he gave Steve a piercing look that made his hackles come up. His eyes were luminous in the sunshine, wide and unblinking, the dark slits of his pupils looking almost sinister. After a long moment, Tony blinked, and the spell was broken. He stretched again before moving toward the tree line.

 _Two moons, Cap,_ he said, and then looked back over his shoulder at Steve. Playfully, he added, _You’re going to be busy howling._

~*~

Despite appearing to weave through the trees at random, Tony found them a narrow road so quickly that Steve could almost believe he’d known it was there. He watched Tony’s swaying hips as they walked, frowning, trying to tease out some thought that he just couldn’t grasp. A bird flew overhead, and Steve’s spine stiffened immediately. He barked to make sure Tony knew it was there, and to make sure the bird knew that Steve knew it was there. The bird banked, but Steve kept barking, muscles quivering. If it would just fly lower, he could wrestle it right out of the air.

 _Do you have to keep doing that at everything that moves?_ Tony demanded, rounding on him. He had his ears pressed down to his skull and his tail lashing around his feet.

 _You are a cat,_ Steve pointed out. _For all we know, that was some kind of monster raven that breathes fire and likes to snack on cats!_ He felt a curious mix of agitation and sorrow as he tried to make Tony understand that he was just protecting them. He was often frustrated by trying to convince Tony that he was doing what was best for them as a team, but maybe being out alone on an alien world was making him even more protective of his teammate. It was important that Tony understood.

Tony, apparently, did not. _I saw the bird. Any time you see something, I’ve seen the same thing move. I just don’t have to announce to the whole damn planet that it exists!_

 _Excuse me for trying to protect you!_ Steve said, the words coming out a mishmash of the strange telepathic communication, and the yips and barks of his vocalizations.

Tony growled low in his throat and darted forward to swipe at Steve’s face. The armor plates around his tail expanded outwards, and puffs of fluffy gray fur showed between the plates. Steve backed away from the snarling cat, lifting his muzzle up to keep it out of reach. 

 _I don’t need your protection!_ Tony finally managed through all the growling.

Steve snapped his teeth, which made Tony jump back and hiss. Settling the weight of the shield on his shoulders again, Steve said, _Yeah. You never do._

They stared at each other for several tense seconds, before Tony finally twitched his ears and twisted around the groom his tail back under the armor plates. Steve could tell that he was still pissed from the tension in his spine, and decided to explore while Tony got himself sorted out.

If he had two legs, he would have stomped off to break a heavy bag or two until he felt calmer. Since he had neither two legs, nor any handy heavy bags, he put his nose to the ground and explored the forest floor in the immediate area. It was hard to concentrate on all the scents with one ear twitched in Tony’s direction, but the strange new smells were slowly calming him down. He had a good sense of a smell as a human, at least he’d had a good sense of smell ever since the serum, but he’d had no idea that there were so many different scents in the world. Just ghosting his nose over a patch of disturbed dirt gave him an impression of all the animals that had passed over it since the last rain. At least two snakes, several squirrels, a powdery scent that was some kind of bird, and a musty smell of growing mushrooms.

Steve became so embroiled in the wonderful world that had been living right under his nose his whole life, that he was startled into a leap when Tony dropped down from a low branch. Steve landed awkwardly and had to scramble back to his feet while Tony made a strange chuffing sound. For a moment, he was worried that he’d scared Tony into some kind of heart attack, but remembered that he’d heard the noise before.

 _You’re laughing at me!_ He realized.

_Too bad I don’t have a camera, you’d do great on YouTube._

Steve bit back the automatic curses, and then perked up. Tony couldn’t understand him. He could curse at Tony all day and call him a self-righteous, over-inflated, self-important, egotist asshole with more daddy issues than money, and that there was not enough sarcasm on the planet to hide his big idiotic heart, and Tony would never know. So Steve did. It came out in a rolling yammer that made Tony start to growl immediately.

“That’s not very nice.”

“Yeah, well you’re not very nice some-” It took Tony hunching up in a fighting stance to make Steve realize that the voice had been someone else’s. He spun to put himself between the sputtering cat and the intruder, and found himself faced with a scarred gray wolf.

Baring his teeth, Steve snapped out a warning bark, and followed on its heels with a vicious growl. The wolf just stared at him, head tilted slightly to one side, tail partway up in a tentatively friendly greeting.

“I didn’t mean to startle you,” she said.

 _What is she saying?_ Tony demanded, easing out to Steve’s left to get a clear line of sight.

Steve couldn’t manage to answer either of them, and just ended up stuck in a loop of growling and short snarls whenever he needed a breath.

Sitting down, the wolf let her tongue loll out of her mouth. “You’re the one in my territory,” she pointed out. She was obviously amused by Steve’s display, or maybe by Tony’s much smaller form next to him. They probably made a strange picture.

 _I’m going to get up this tree and see if she has any friends,_ Tony decided.

 _Wait!_ Steve managed finally. His growl petered out to a short _wuff_ , and he forced his lips to cover his teeth again. His heart fluttered so hard against his ribcage that it almost felt like some kind of fainting episode, but he managed to sit upright. _She’s sorry for startling us, and we’re in her territory,_ Steve summed up.

 _My apologies,_ the she-wolf said, breaking into their conversation. Tony jumped about a foot in the air and hissed at her, fur bristling out through the plates in her armor. _You’re a bit touchy_ , she observed. Whether it was just bad timing, or she did it on purpose, Steve didn’t know, but she chose that moment to lick her lips.

Tony hunched back to flash his teeth at her. _Try it, bitch,_ he suggested.

Unfazed by the insult, she dropped to the ground and rolled around, laughing. Steve’s ears flicked at the sound. It was both very clearly a laugh, and also just a collection of high-pitched yips. Tony made an unhappy _yrowling_ sound.

_She’s laughing at me!_

Steve did not miss the parallel, but he let it slide. _Yup_.

 _Sorry,_ the wolf said. _You’re just very feisty, and very small. It’s cute._

Tony huffed out an annoyed breath, and Steve repressed a yipping laugh of his own. Tony might be even smaller, comparatively, than he usually was, but Steve didn’t really want to go up against him when he was so wound up. Tony had always been so cool under pressure, that all the growing and hissing was new and delightful. He got the distinct impression that the wolf was fascinated by Tony and trying to get him away from Steve’s side.

 _Could you direct us to a town of some kind?_ Steve asked before the wolf goaded Tony away from Steve for tussle in the undergrowth. _We’re… strangers here._

 _You didn’t need to tell me that,_ she replied, craning her neck around to look up Steve. _You’re very different. Your colors are strange._

He wished she would get up. Having her on her back with her belly showing was making him uncomfortable. He shifted his weight between his forepaws while she twisted to look up him, her tail swishing playfully through the undergrowth. Finally deciding to take pity on him, the shewolf rolled onto her belly, and then took her time sitting up.

Steve looked over his shoulder at Tony, still crouched low to the ground with his ears pressed to his skull, and then looked to the wolf. _Please,_ Steve said. _We could use your help_

The wolf considered them for several long moments while Tony made a long series of low-pitched cat noises. Steve had no doubt that Tony was taking advantage of their differing languages to give Steve a thorough tongue lashing. He thought about telling Tony to stuff it, but he couldn’t exactly throw stones.

 _Come with me,_ the wolf said. _I’ll take you to the main road. You’ll make a village by nightfall if you don’t get distracted by the local wildlife._

 _Thank you,_ Steve said. He looked back at Tony, who was abruptly uninterested in the preceding. He turned and aggressively groomed his fur back into place. _We’re very grateful._

The wolf let her tongue lull out. “Obviously.” She turned and trotted off into the woods. “He’ll catch up. Cats have a good sense of direction.”

Steve looked at Tony again, who still very loudly ignoring him, and took a few steps forward. _Are you coming?_ Tony said nothing, but the wolf wasn’t stopping. Steve could follow her to the road, and then come back for Tony.

“He can’t help it, you know,” the wolf said when Steve caught up to her. “Cats process differently than we do, and they get cranky if they don’t get enough sleep. Your colors are strange besides. He just needs some time to get his fur back in order. They’re loyal, good hunters.  You’re lucky to have him. He’ll catch up.”

Steve looked back uncertainly. “How far is the road?”

She laughed. “Not far,” she assured him, but she moved at a deliberate, sedate pace.

Realizing that they’d never introduced themselves amongst all the snarling and hissing and laughing, Steve said, “My name is Steve.”

Stopping, the wolf turned to look at him. She tilted her head, and then tried the name out. “Stee-b. How odd. My name is Gray Walker of Dusk Woods. You may call me Walker.”

Steve tossed his head in acknowledgement. “It’s nice to meet you, Walker. My friend’s name is Tony.”

Walker blinked. “What strange names you have.”  

“We’re… well, we’re not from around here.” Steve wasn’t sure if he should tell her that they were from another planet, and that he wasn’t actually a wolf. For one, he didn’t know if she’d believe him, and for all he knew, humans were the enemy.

She stared at him very intently for several long seconds before saying, “I see.”

~*~

“Get a grip,” Tony told himself while he groomed his fur back into place, annoyed at the poor design that lead to his fur getting caught between plates whenever he puffed up.

“It’s not my fur,” he told himself, “and I don’t get puffed up. I’m a person, not a cat. I don’t have fur. This is not a problem with my design. It’s just… like a Halloween costume. I’m going to take it off at the end of the night, and never remember to pick it from the dry cleaners ever again.”

It had been a very long time since he’d felt so untethered. He would have thought that he knew what it felt like to be tired, but something about being in this new, compact body made him feel exhausted like never he’d never been before. The desire to find some place warm and safe so he could go to sleep was as strong as any urge to drink ever had been.

He was not unaccustomed to being the smallest man in the room, but he’d never gone tromping through the woods before with someone who could fit half of his body in their mouth.

“Whole new meaning to ‘don’t bite my head off.’” Tony started snickering to himself. He yawned hugely, and looked up to see the sun filtering down through the trees. He twisted back in the direction that Steve had gone off to with the wolf, and then down at the ground. It was a nice spot, and he could use a nap, but his teammate had wandered off with a stranger, and Tony should probably be more worried about that.

“Dogs,” he groused as he got the last of his tail back in order, and then took off after them. They were not in sight, but he could hear them yammering at each other through the trees. Ears alert for any other sounds, Tony hopped along the sprawling root system of a massive purplish tree, and then leapt nimbly over a shallow, dry creek bed.

He could hear them just on the other side of a bush when there was a sharp snap of dry wood breaking, and then a throaty snarl. In the time it took Tony to register the noise, the soft chattering of dog-speak had descended into deep growls punctuated by loud barks. Tony bounded around the bush, cursing himself for letting Steve just walk off with a stranger. They might not get along all the time, but Steve was his teammate, and Tony shouldn’t have just trusted him the company of a strange wolf.

By the time he’d made it around the bush, Steve and the wolf were rolling in the dry leaves. They snarled at each other viciously while they tussled. The big wolf was on top of Steve, her front paws on his chest while he pushed up at her neck. She craned down like she meant to bite into his throat.

Shouting wordlessly, Tony launched into the air. He landed more-or-less on the wolf’s back, just barely aware of his claws extending through his armor to dig into her thick fur. He scrabbled at her ribs with his back claws for purchase and bit into the back of her neck. Her fur was coarse and like biting into a high pile carpet.

Startled, the wolf threw her head back. She yipped, bounded sideways, and started to shake. Tony held on like a limpet, gnawing through her stinking fur to get to her equally thick skin. She yowled, and bucked to throw him off.

Tony lost his tenuous grip. He flew through the air, twisting over and over so he hit the ground on all fours, and then skidded another few feet through the dry brush. He ended up between Steve and the wolf, and crouched down to get his chest close to the dirt and his back paws under his belly. She might be able to swallow him in a bite and a half, but he’d at least take one of her eyes with him.

She stared at him incredulously, her ears rotated out and head down.

 _Can you stand?_ Tony asked without looking at Steve.

He heard a rustle of dry leaves and clanking metal as Steve rolled onto his feet. _Tony, I’m okay! Walker and I were just playing!_

It took a moment for the words to penetrate. Tony let the tension out of his muscles, easing down to the ground. He pressed his ears back and looked over his shoulder to glare at Steve.

_Good thing you never play with me, I guess._

_Sorry,_ Steve offered, ducking his head. His tail tucked slowly down between his legs, and he inched forward to nudge at Tony’s hindquarter with his giant, wet nose.

Tony decided to ignore him. Cats played the I’m Ignoring You as if You Do Not Exist game all the time. He was a cat (Temporarily, a cat-shaped person), he could play that game. On the other side of the small clearing, the wolf had her tongue lulling out of her mouth, lips stretched into a grin without a hint of teeth showing. She tilted her head to look at Tony quizzically.

Steve shoved him hard enough to tip his hips over and nudged his nose into Tony’s belly. Tony promptly put a foot against his face and pushed hard. Steve made a _rauwr-ah!_ Noise of pleading that Tony ignored, because he was ignoring Steve like Steve didn’t exist. As soon as Steve’s nose was out of Tony’s space, he twisted his hips so his back was to Steve, and then turned his attention back to the wolf.

 _You’re very protective of your friend,_ the wolf observed.

 _Who?_ Tony asked obstinately. Steve grunted, got down on his belly, and scooted his way closer to Tony’s side.

The wolf turned to look at the sky, and then looked between them. _Let’s go,_ she said simply.

Tony got up to follow her without acknowledging Steve’s antics, which earned him a disappointed huff. Still ignoring him, Tony veered off to the left and hopped up on a fallen tree. Steve trotted along underneath him, and the wolf seemed to be ignoring them both as she ambled through the undergrowth.

 _You two are very odd,_ she observed after several moments of nearly-companionable silent travel. _Odd names, odd colors… you act like mates._

Steve snorted so loudly it sounded like a cough. Tony decided to ignore the comment, which was becoming more fun by the moment. Maybe when he got back to being a human, he could continue the gaming of just ignoring things. He’d always been good at selective hearing, but mostly that was obtained by talking over people. If he could master the cat-trick of pretending people didn’t exist, his life would be a lot easier.

_We haven’t even been introduced, I don’t think you can call me odd._

_Tony, this is Gray Walker of the Dusk Woods,_ Steve hurried to interject, like the introduction was a foot in the door. _Walker, Tony._

Walker laughed in a short huff of breath, but didn’t elaborate except to repeat, _Odd._

~*~

Afternoon was stretching quickly toward dusk when Walker hopped lightly down a shallow hill, and landed in a packed dirt road. She sat down and pointed her nose toward the quickly descending sun. _Follow the sun to the horizon. You will reach the village by tomorrow mid-day._

 _Thank you, Walker,_ Steve said, sounding less like a whiny husky and more like himself. He leapt down next to her with the casual grace that Tony had come to expect of Captain America, and then turned to look in the direction she had indicated. _We appreciate the escort._

Tony stayed up on top of the hill to watch the two wolves. They shared some sort of silent exchange in flicking ears and tilting heads. After a moment, they started making noise at each other, and then Walker leaned forward and sniffed at Steve’s muzzle. Steve went still for a moment before tilting his head to sniff at her as well. They both pulled back at the same time.

 _Odd,_ she again said with a note like suspicion in her voice.

 _Maybe you’re the odd one,_ Steve countered.

Tony hopped down and sauntered in between them to interrupt what looked like a brewing, baffling fight. He intentionally smacked Steve in the face with his tail, and then sat down between his feet. _I am not going anywhere else without a nap_ , he announced.

Walker took a step back, huffed at them, and then let out a long sigh. _I am not sure where you two came from, but ask after the Sorcerer Supreme at the village. Someone there should be able to point you in the right direction._

With that as a cryptic farewell, she hopped nimbly back up the hill, and disappeared into the trees.

 _And she says_ we’re _odd,_ Steve grumbled.

 _Were you two just about to start fighting?_ Tony asked, moving out from between Steve’s feet, and turning around to look at him.

Steve shifted his weight between his front paws and tossed his head. _I think so?_

Tony wished he could still lift one eyebrow. He tried, but all he managed was swiveling his left ear to the side. Steve obviously didn’t interpret the gesture correctly, and looked off to the left, alert for any signs of movement.

 _Why?_ Tony pressed.

Steve’s ears swiveled back, and then forward. _I’m not sure. Something about the way she smelled._

 _Great. So everyone here can smell how ‘odd’ we are. Hopefully that doesn’t lead to mobs with pitchforks. Or whatever cats and dogs use to murder aliens._ Tony yawned until it felt like his jaw was going to unhinge, and then padded across the road and hopped up the shallower slope into a patch of fading sunlight. _I was serious about that nap._


	3. Chapter Two

A tickle across his nose pulled him out of sleep. Tony was warm and comfortable, and sensed no immediate danger nearby. Without opening his eyes, he rolled into the soft warmth against his back. His paws reached out instinctively to press into piles of plush fur. He started to knead, and found the movement immediately and intensely pleasurable. Warmth settled in his chest, and then worked slowly up his throat. A deep, rumbling purr spilled out in its wake, and he shifted around so he could press the toes of his back feet into warmth as well.

This might have gone all night, but the plushy warmth abruptly stood up. Annoyed, Tony curled his neck to bring his head off the ground and glared at his retreating blanket.

 _Sorry,_ Steve said, yawning, _You were pushing on my bladder._ He trotted off around a tree and lifted his back leg without concern for being watched.

Awareness came back all at once. Tony sat up, and decided that it would probably be best for all involved if no one mentioned the fact that he and Captain America had been spooning on the forest floor. Or that Tony had cheerfully set off to stock an entire bakery with his fidgety paws. He jumped back down into the road as Steve came ambling back, great big jaws spread wide in a fearsome yawn.

Steve looked mildly confused to find Tony down in the road instead up in the shallow scoop their bodies had made as they’d slept. For that matter, Tony didn’t remember inviting Steve into his scoop in the first place, so it wasn’t his fault if Steve didn’t like get his bladder massaged. Tony felt his tail start to thump in the packed soil as Steve just sat down at the top of the hill and stared down at him.

Tony huffed. _Hi,_ he said with false sweetness. _My name is Tony Stark, I’m a Gemini. I like long moonlit walks through the forest, and not being a cat any more._

Steve’s bushy dog brows lowered over his eyes. He made a low rolling noise that accompanied the tossing of his head, and then hopped into the road. _It’s not my fault that you slept all day,_ he said as he passed Tony at a leisurely walk.

 _The sun was almost down,_ Tony argued. _That is not ‘all day.’_

 _Sure,_ Steve said like he was humoring Tony. He twisted to look at Tony over his shoulder, his tail curled up so it nearly rested on his back. _Coming, Mr. Stark?_

~*~

The lights from the village were visible through the trees for several hours before they started seeing signs of habitation. Steve’s stomach was trying to eat its way through his ribs, and Tony had become steadily crankier as the night had worn on. The first moon had already set, and though its absence had made the sky seem darker, the air somehow smelled like morning was fast on the approach.

 _Not as far away as your friend suggested,_ Tony commented when they reached the top of a rise in the road and found the village spread out below them. He almost sounded more annoyed that it had been a shorter trip than he’d expected.

It was still some distance away, but Steve guessed that they would reach the outskirts of the village within the next hour. He looked up at the sky again.

 _She probably assumed we would sleep all night and get up in the morning like sane people,_ Steve pointed out. Tony only hu-rruphed at him, taking the excuse of the brief pause to groom his face. The armor plates were obviously not ideal for the task, and his ears had flattened to his head within the second pass. Without putting much thought into it, Steve leaned over and licked a broad stripe across Tony much smaller head.

They were both so startled that they just stared at each other for several seconds.

_Did you just…?_

_Let’s not talk about it,_ Steve interrupted. He hurried down the rise toward the village, leaving Tony to catch up with him. They hadn’t had the opportunity to really discuss their situation, but their interactions were beginning to worry Steve more and more.

Waking up in a strange body wasn’t exactly unfamiliar to him. It had taken him months after Project Rebirth to not wake up in a panic of frantically patting hands to make sure his new body hadn’t been a dream, and it had taken months and months more to get a handle on where his limbs were going to be at any given moment. Waking up as Not Human was something he’d had more than one nightmare about over the years. Despite all of that, it had taken only a few hours to go from the absolute horror of waking up in a four-legged creature’s body, to having some trouble conceptualizing walking on two feet. Licking Tony’s face had seemed natural, as natural as curling up next to him for warmth, and he was having increasing trouble stopping himself from sniffing Tony’s ass just to make sure he was healthy.

 _Alright, slow down for a second!_ Tony called.

Steve obligingly stopped for Tony to catch up, looking back at him curiously. Tony got up on his hind feet, planting his forepaws on Steve’s ribs to steady himself. For a moment, Steve thought that Tony was about to hop up on his back, but Tony just shoved his face against Steve’s shirt and rubbed vigorously.

 _What are you doing?_ he demanded, but he held carefully still while Tony nuzzled against him. Entirely without his permission, his tail started wagging. Trying to make it stop just resulted in a weird series of jerking motions that set his teeth on edge.

 _I am covered in dog slobber,_ Tony explained with a hint of a glare in his voice. He finally dropped back to all fours, and then walked underneath Steve, apparently just to be obtuse. He knocked his head against Steve’s ribs on the way through, and then continued up the road in a saunter, tail up. _Keep your big dog-slobbery tongue in your mouth next time_ , he suggested.

“Last time I try to help you,” Steve muttered, twisting to sniff at the wet patch on shirt. He bit at an itch on his back leg while he was there, and then dropped into the road and rolled around a bit. The shield scratched against the dirt, but he managed to more or less get the shirt dry.

 _Dogs_ , Tony complained, watching him from afar with an obviously disgusted grimace.

 _You’re one to talk, you lousy feline_.

Tony huffed out a puff of air, and then turned without another word and disappeared over the next rise in the road. Steve reluctantly got up off the ground to trot after him. His uniform top was compressing his fur, and rolling about in the dirt had just gotten it all out of place. He wanted to get out of the uniform top, but then he wouldn’t be able to carry the shield, and he was not leaving it in this strange world. He was also reluctant to part with the last tangible thing reminding him that he was human.

His larger stride brought him even with Tony in a few moments. They walked quietly next to each other as the second moon crept toward the horizon, and the sky behind them grew steadily lighter. The road dipped down a hill the closer they got to the village, and Steve realized that what they had seen of the village from the top of the rise had been only the upper levels. He craned his neck back as they passed under an arch of slender braided trees wound with flowering vines. Mist wound between the trunks of the trees and stretched fine tendrils over the road. The main road was lined with oddly shaped buildings of various sizes, all squeezed in together without regard for relative size. Further back, more houses, larger, had been built against the massive tree trunks, and looked to drill directly into them. Crude steps wound up these trees to homes perched further up in the boughs. Rope bridges stretched between the higher levels, and glowing globes dropped down from branches and the undersides of bridges, giving the whole village an ethereal quality.

He may have been raised Catholic, but his Irish mother had instilled a sometimes-contradictory, though just as fervently adhered-to respect for the wee folk. Looking around the village made the fur on the back of his neck stand up. For one moment, he wondered if the puddles of darkness had really been fairy rings. He’d inhaled enough dust and bugs while exploring the forest to make him wonder if it counted as eating.

 _Maybe we shouldn’t be here_ , Steve suggested nervously, unconsciously taking a step back toward the arched entry. He looked over his shoulder, more than half expecting the entrance to have disappeared in the fog.

“Morning!”

Steve jumped, yelping at the sudden high-pitched voice. Tony cackled. The puppy standing at the edge of the road wagged his tail furiously.

“You’re strangers!” the puppy announced excitedly. He wagged his tail so hard that he knocked himself over. “Hi! Are you here to see someone? Is it my mom? Do you want to see her? I’ll get her!” He scrambled up and made awkward progress back to his front door, yapping the whole time, and seeming to be unsure if he wanted to run or jump. He tripped three times before squirming through the opening in one of the larger houses. Steve could hear him frantically calling to his mom through the open window.

 _Well,_ Tony said, _That’s interesting._

Before Steve could respond, a sleek golden dog with a wedge-shaped head, and alert, pointed ears ducked out of the house. The puppy spilled out after her, bouncing eagerly around her feet. In the next moment, four more puppies tumbled through the door. The last in the bunch was barely awake, and weaved on her feet as she followed her littermates.

Steve stared at the approaching dog in shock. She was… she was beautiful. Beautiful like Peggy had been beautiful. She had solemn dark brown eyes, and shapely legs, and her coat glistened in the early morning light. He blinked, and tossed his head, feeling intensely uncomfortable. The dog looked between them curiously, and then executed a surprisingly graceful bow of her shapely head.

 _Hello_ , she greeted while her puppies bounced around her excitedly, except the littlest one, who had plopped her butt down in the grass and was swaying with her eyes partially open.

 _H-hi,_ Steve gulped.

Tony looked up at him curiously.

Steve suppressed a whine. He sat down and straightened himself out, holding his head up high. _My name is Steve. This is my friend Tony. We’re traveling through here._

She looked between the two of them silently. The first puppy left her shadow to race back over to Steve’s side. He stood up on his hind legs and bounced excitedly, pawing at Steve’s shoulder in a bid for attention. Not knowing what to do with the pup, Steve just stared at him.

 _Those are funny names!_ The puppy declared. He abandoned Steve’s side and trundled over to Tony. Tony pulled away from him, but the puppy followed eagerly. He all but jumped on Tony’s back, and went right for his ear. Tony flailed in confused indecision. A high-pitched growl started, and then immediately stuttered to a stop in his throat. The puppy nipped at Tony’s ear again.

 _Why’s your fur so funny?_ The puppy asked. _Why you got such a funny name? You smell different! Hey! My name is Sunshine on Wet Grass after the Rain. It’s really long. Your name’s so short and weird!_

 _Sunshine,_ the elegant dog said after a few moments of the interrogation. “Leave the cat alone.”

 _Mom, did you hear his name? What’s it mean? It’s funny!_ He barked, which finally got Tony out of his shocked indecision. He gently pushed the puppy away. When Sunshine tried to tackle him again, he put a single paw on the pup’s head.

 _Down, kid_ , he said.

 _I’m not a kid, I’m a puppy!_ Sunshine declared, puffing his little chest up.

Steve finally took pity on his teammate and leaned down to pick Sunshine up. Without really knowing how he knew to do it, he got the puppy right away by the neck. Sunshine went obligingly limp in his grip, and Steve carried him back over to the beautiful mother dog. One of her puppies had pushed underneath her belly and was trying to get to a teat. Steve set Sunshine down, who promptly climbed over one of his brothers to muscle between his mom’s front legs. She bore up to their seeking noses gracefully.

 _My name is Moonlight on New Dandelions_ , she said finally, looking once more in between Steve and Tony. _Welcome, travelers_.

The last she said uncertainly, as if she would rather not encourage their presence, but she was too polite to tell them to leave. Steve hurriedly stepped away from her so she didn’t feel crowded. She looked at him with undisguised curiosity as did.

 _We were told someone in this village could point us to the Sorcerer Supreme,_ Tony said after a second of awkward silence.

Moonlight’s head went back, obviously startled by the suggestion, but a flash of motion grabbed her attention before she could reply. She stood up, dislodging the hopeful puppies into a pile of squirming limbs, and walked regally past Steve into the road. Steve turned to follow her progress, and found a group of mixed dogs, cats, and what looked like mice trooping into the village. A pair of birds swooped overhead, cawed, and then disappeared into the trees.

One of the dogs broke away from the group to meet Moonlight in the road. They touched noses, and then spent a couple seconds sniffing at each other’s mouths. The whole gaggle of puppies, even the sleepy little girl, went bounding over to them, barking out, “Dad! Dad’s back! Daddy!”

Another of the dogs joined them. She got a lick on the face from Moonlight, and then was piled with puppies shouting, “Sister!”

While they watched the reunion, other animals came out of their houses. Dozens of tiny baby mice spilled onto the street to swarm around the returning adults, cats hopped down from homes up the tree trunks, more dogs appeared through openings in the larger houses. To Steve’s astonishment, the last to join the party was a giant kangaroo with a heavy necklace resting on his chest. It was the first sign of adornment he’d seen on any of the animals they’d encountered.

 _What is going on_? Tony asked in a whisper as the throng of animals gradually surrounded them. None of them spoke, but they all gave Steve and Tony curious looks.

Finally, Moonlight’s mate stepped gingerly over his puppies and walked the few steps to stand opposite Steve. Steve was the larger by a good margin, but the other dog had a look about him that made Steve wary all the same. He had a wide face, and smooth fur mottled chocolate and russet brown. He gave Steve a careful once over, and then leaned forward to sniff at him. Steve was caught between pulling away from the treatment, and leaning forward to do the same. Off to his side, Tony readied himself for a fight.

The smaller dog sneezed.

 _What is your business here?_ He asked. The voice that translated in Steve’s head was low and gravelly. Steve noticed that he had a series of three parallel white streaks down his neck, and wondered what had happened.

 _We’re just passing through_ , Tony told him. _We’re looking for the Sorcerer Supreme_.

A murmur of animal voices went through the audience.

 _Gray Walker of the Dusk Woods told us to ask here_ , Steve hurried to add.

Palpable relief ran through the crowd. Moonlight’s mate relaxed immediately. He sat back on his haunches and let his tongue lull out of his mouth. Sunlight hopped over to get in between his front legs and stared up at Steve with a kind of smug look, like he deserved credit for Steve and Tony’s presence in the village.

 _I am Riverstones,_ the smaller dog said. _Any friend of Walker’s is welcome here_.

_We just –_

_Appreciate that very much_ , Tony interrupted before Steve could confess that they weren’t really friends with the big gray wolf.

 _You look road weary,_ Moonlight added, stepping up next to her mate. She was the larger of the pair by far, but ducked her head sweetly to lick at his chin. _Come, we’ll get you food and a place to rest._ She looked over at Tony. _Perhaps you would be more comfortable in one of the higher perches? They get better sunlight._

Tony looked up at houses set higher along the trunks. His whiskers stretched forward in obvious longing, but he said, _I’ll stay with Steve_.

 _What strange names you have,_ the big kangaroo commented. _You must be from far away indeed_.

 _Further than you know_ , Tony muttered.

They followed Moonlight and her excited gaggle of pups into the house, leaving the excited whispers of the villagers behind them.

~*~

The dogs’ house was at last quiet. Getting breakfast prepared had been a study in chaos. Tony had found himself a perch up on a shelf that kept him out of the way of the puppies, and had watched the scene in claustrophobic terror. Moonlight had quickly put Steve to work hauling cuts of meat out of what Tony guessed was an underground cellar. While the puppies had chased her with increasingly shrill demands for food, Moonlight had pulled the slabs on meet onto a hot stone to cook.

Tony had been surprised by the immediate disgust he’d felt at the scent of charring meat. He’d thought longingly of a hamburger, but in his mind, the hamburger was raw. Riverstones had joined them after a moment and took over the cooking so his mate could stretch out on a wide couch. The puppies had swarmed all over her like something out of a horror film, but she had been quiescent and relaxed as they nursed.

When the slabs of still bloody meat were dropped into a wide, shallow box that seemed to serve as something like a table, Tony had only very reluctantly climbed down from his perch to join Riverstones and Steve on the worn cushions. He had found himself patting at the cooked meat like he wanted it to move, and he really _had_ wanted it to move.

Before he could gather up the nerves to eat the cooked food, a scratch at the door had heralded a big gray tomcat. He’d come in backwards, his tail up in the air, and holding a great flopping fish by the tail. Steve had shifted over, and the tom had joined them at the table, dropping the fish in front of Tony and inviting him to dig in.

Tony had always been a fan of sushi, but that had been heavenly.

After suckling their fill, the pups had curled up in heaps with their bellies distended and muzzles moist with milk. Moonlight had joined them at the table, wolfing down the largest helping of meat while the rest of them finished up. She’d gone back to her puppies immediately after. Tony and the tom didn’t speak. The tom had snuffled at him for a few seconds, Tony sniffed him back, and then they went their separate ways. It had been one of the most civilized and productive conversations Tony had ever had. He could get use to the cat thing.

Once the tom had gone, Steve and Riverstones laid down by the fireplace to take a nap, and Tony had found a sunny windowsill. After all the chaos of the morning meal, Tony was immensely grateful for the quiet. He studied the dogs while they all dozed. Steve was as big as Walker had been, and dwarfed every other dog in the village substantially, and was a moving mountain compared to all the other animals, except maybe the kangaroo.

Maybe the weird make-up of the village’s inhabitants wasn’t so strange. Big cities had all kinds of diversity, neighborhoods of people from all over the world living within a stone’s throw of each other. Still, how did the mice comfortably live in a village when their upstairs neighbors were cats and birds? He cleaned his paw idly, unsheathing his claws to get to the fish scale stuck in his glove.

While he had the downtime and the dogs were dozing, Tony started examining the armor for the catches. Just like with the helmet, he was worried that he wouldn’t be able to get the suit back on if he took it off, but he still wanted to know how to get out of it. In his own universe, he’d designed the suit to be a livable environment for days in case of an emergency, but he had no idea how this modified version of the suit worked, and he was going to need to relieve himself sooner rather than later.

With concerted exploration, he found a depressed catch on the underside of his right foreleg, and a raised catch in his groin that he was able to depress with his nose. And okay, how had it not occurred to him yet that he was now perfectly capable of licking his own dick? Once the catch had been pressed, the locks down his spine clicked open – _ticktickticktick_ – and the armor plates from his shoulders to his tail folded up while the locks on his underbelly folded up toward his chest. In a matter of moments, the suit had compressed into a backpack piled up on his shoulders. The catch on his foreleg _click_ ed into the up position, like he assumed it would.

Beneath the armor, his fur was moist and pressed down close to his body. He stretched, grateful to feel the breeze on his body. Hopping down, he made his way outside to relieve himself. The street was alive. Mostly dogs with their puppies, but he could see mice scurrying beneath their paws. He wondered briefly why he didn’t feel any particular urge to chase them, and then chastised himself silently. They were obviously thinking beings. Not wanting to run them down and pull them apart shouldn’t be a surprise.

He traveled some distance out of the village to find a makeshift bathroom for himself. He didn’t want to end up shitting in someone’s vegetable patch. Relieved, and mess firmly covered up with dirt and dry leaves, Tony took a meandering path back toward the village. The suit being folded up as a backpack threw his balance off, but he was reluctantly to fold it back down over his fur.

Alone in the woods, Tony tried to make sense of where they’d landed. The lack of color vision aside, the world was vibrant with sounds and scents that he couldn’t find words to describe. He gave into the sudden desire to run up a tree’s rough bark. He almost fell off from the weight on his back, but recovered with thoughtless ease, finding that place again where his body moved with seamless coordination.

As easily as he had sprung into motion, he found stillness at the base of a thick branch. He sat down, comfortable with being motionless in a way that he hadn’t been for a long time. Stretching out along the branch, he balanced himself comfortably, and promptly went to sleep.

~*~

When he woke up, the sun was sinking below the horizon. Tony yawned and dug his claws into the bark so he could stretch his spine out. He didn’t think he’d ever been so relaxed. Eyeing the darkening sky, Tony considered just going back to sleep. Another eight or twelve or twenty hours sounded nice.

Before he’d made up his mind, he heard a soft scuffle in the undergrowth. Moving just enough to see the ground, Tony went still. The sound came again, a soft whisper of movement over dry brush. When the sound came for a third time, it was followed closely by a dragging noise. Faintly, he heard a squeak.

Tony’s ears pricked forward. The squeak came again, but more distinct this time. It was the cry of a very young kitten. Equal parts curious and concerned, Tony listened in for the direction of the noise. The dragging sound came closer, and then closer again. A gigantic, wiry gray rat limped across the ground, each step crunching over the dry leaves, while its fat tail dragged behind it. Over its back, it had a squirming, crying sack.

Muscles going tight, Tony waited until the rat was directly underneath him, and then pounced. He dropped into the thick carpet of dry leaves to the rat’s left, and took a swipe at him. The rat hissed in obvious surprise, dropped the bag, and ran. Tony’s claws dug into the dirt in an instinctive reaction to give chase, but a terrified cry from the bag brought him up short. He reseathed his claws, and moved over to investigate the bag.

“Hey, it’s okay, you’re safe now,” he said softly, and then tore at the rope with his teeth. The kitten inside meowed piteously and began to shake. Tony started to purr just to let them know that he was still there, gnawing and tugging at the rope, annoyed all over again that he didn’t have opposable thumbs anymore.

He managed to get the bag open at last, and found the kitten pressed all the way to the back of it. She trembled so hard that it looked painful, and smelled distinctly of urine.

“Mommy!” she cried softly, and then again, “I want mommy!”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Tony said soothingly. “Let’s get you back to your mommy.”

She opened her eyes, saw him crouched at the opening of the bag, and crept forward, crying wordlessly. Tony licked her face while she continued to squeak out tiny cries, and then nudged the bag back so he could clean her ears and neck. She quieted gradually, moving closer to him in tiny steps until she curled under his chin. Tony kept bathing her until she stopped shaking despite the acrid taste of urine on her fur.

“Let’s get you home to mommy, okay?” he asked. He wanted to get her out of there in hurry in case the rat came back, maybe with friends.

She cuddled tighter to side, her tail tucked around her feet, face hidden in his fur. Letting out a soft sigh, Tony curled over to grab her by the scruff. Her back feet came up immediately, and her tail tucked against her belly, making her a compact package. The forest looked different in the dark, and Tony had a moment’s worry that he wouldn’t be able to find his way back to the village, but his feet seemed to know the way. The kitten remained quiet as they moved, not even making a peep when he set her down for a break before picking her up again.

The village lights were burning brightly, and there was a great bustle of noise as he found his way back to the dogs’ house. He hopped over the fence with some trouble, unbalanced by the kitten in his jaws, and the suit still sitting on his shoulders. He had to put the kitten down for a second, and she immediately curled up by his feet, fighting to squirm under his belly. Tony let his weight rest on her, and she started to purr loudly. He found himself purring in response, the vibration in his chest making him feel better.

The commotion finally resolved into shouts of panic. Tony snagged the kitten and hurried to cover. He needed to see what was going on, but he couldn’t leave the kitten alone, and he couldn’t just take her out into a fight. She remained quiet and sweetly trusting as he crept around the house to peer into the street. There were no rats running rampant through the street, just the same villagers he’d seen earlier that day.

“Nighteyes!” A shrill female voice cried. “My baby! Where is my baby?”

The kitten, quiet up to then, began to cry in sharp piercing bursts. Tony immediately moved out of the cover of the house as the terrified mother turned toward the sound. The rest of the villagers came running as well, and Tony hastily put the kitten down, afraid they might think he’d been trying to kidnap her.

“I found her in the woods!” he said hurriedly.

The other cat didn’t even acknowledge that he’d spoken. She rushed forward to grab the kitten, and then dragged her back a few feet. She set immediately to grooming the crying kitten, licking her roughly, frantically.

 _Tony! Where have you been? I’ve been looking for you all day!_ Steve demanded as he broke through the crowd of gathered cats. _I’ve been so worried!_

Before Tony could say anything, Steve was pressing him to the ground with his greater weight, licking his head, and sniffing him all over.

 _Get off me!_ Tony said when he recovered from the shock. He started to squirm. _Get off, you mangy canine!_ He yowled, hissed, and kicked frantically to get out from under Steve’s belly, which only seemed to help Steve in his quest to sniff every individual fur on Tony’s body. When he felt Steve’s blunt nose press against his ass, Tony turned and swiped him hard on the muzzle. _I said stop_!

 _Don’t ever run off like that again!_ Steve countered, showing Tony his teeth. _What am I supposed to do if you get lost? Something could have happened to you!_

_I got a nap in a tree, and saved a kid from being carted off by a giant rat, I think my day went just fine!_

Steve barked out something that was obviously not complimentary, paced a series of quick circles in the grass, and then sat down. He sulked, his ears turning outwards and going down, tail thumping hard against the ground.

“Where was she?” a cat asked once the general hubbub had quieted.

Turning his back on Steve, Tony relayed the brief tale to worried murmurs from the gathered crowd.

 _It is a coven of witch rats,_ the kangaroo said when he’d finished his story. _They’ve been terrorizing this area for months, stealing kittens. We lost an entire litter last month._

One of the adult cats let out a mournful cry, and the others around her pressed in close, purring and licking her face and neck. Steve made a little _woof_ ing sound low in his throat, great big head ducking down. Tony felt a growl settling in his chest. He knocked his left paw into the back of his right foreleg. The crowd pulled away from him as the armor _snicktsnicktsnickt_ ed down his spine and wrapped around his body.

_Do you know where this coven is?_

_They’re in the cliffs, but we haven’t been able to get into the cave, and we can’t find the ground entrance. The upper approach is heavily guarded._

Without thinking about it, Tony dropped his head all the way down, curling his shoulders forward. The motion triggered the helmet, which folded gently around his ears, and then down over his face. In a rush of light, the HUD came up. He curled his paws, and a display came up. Two fast blinks activated the jets. Tony hovered a foot off the ground, and then dropped back down. He looked over at Steve.

Steve stood. _Show us to that cave. We’ll get in, and we’ll drag those rats down._


	4. Chapter Three

They moved quietly through the woods, following on Riverstone’s heels as he wove confidently between tree trunks and navigated around protruding roots with the surety of a predator in his own territory. Steve kept one ear tilted toward Tony. He was able to track the cat only because Tony’s armor made the softest of noises as the metal plates whispered across each other. Otherwise, he was nearly invisible in the darkness.

Riverstones made an abrupt turn at a shallow creek. He led them upstream for what Steve gauged to be about a mile, though it was harder to judge distances in his canine form. While he missed the color vision, there was almost a sort of nostalgia about it that reminded him of being a child. The tradeoff for his missing color vision was night vision like he’d never experienced. He knew Tony’s eyes would be more acute than his in the dark, and wondered what the night time world looked like to him when it was so beautiful to Steve.

 _Here,_ Riverstones said softly as they came to a natural bridge of accumulated logs and rocks that created a small trickle of a waterfall in the creek. He hopped nimbly up to the mossy log, jumped immediately to a large bolder, and then dropped into the creek and forded the last few lengths to the opposite shore.

 _That looks wet,_ Tony complained.

 _I’ll carry you_ , Steve offered, stopping with his forepaws on the log.

Tony was quiet for a long beat. Steve expected him to say something snide and swim all the way across just to prove he could, but Tony surprised him by hopping lightly onto the shield and getting comfortable high on Steve’s shoulders. His chin rested on the top of Steve’s head, and his legs splayed out to either side of Steve’s neck for balance.

 _Mush_ , Tony commanded once he was settled.

Steve couldn’t help a laugh as he hopped onto the log. Tony’s claws sank into his fur for purchase, but he didn’t complain at being jostled. Steve still took extra care getting from the log to the bolder, and stepped into the water rather than vaulting over it to reduce the risk of losing his small companion. Riverstones waited for them patiently on the opposite bank, his tongue hanging out of his mouth in a doggy grin. Steve recognized the sly look on his face as one of understanding, and felt himself ducking his head in slight embarrassment. Tony licked his ear once as a shorthand for _thanks_ , and hopped down to the ground. He padded past Riverstones, who said nothing about their behavior, and then waited at the top of the bank for them to catch up.

“You’re very nice to your friend,” Riverstones commented softly as they began to climb a steeper hill.

Steve’s ears swiveled side-to-side. “He’s a good friend,” he said finally, defensively, though he wasn’t sure what he was defending.

Riverstones made a low noise, and then pulled ahead in a brief burst of speed.

The terrain grew steeper still until Steve was fighting for each upward step, hopping up more than running. The smaller Riverstones took each step deliberately with grim determination. Far ahead of them, Tony bounced from tree trunk to stone to tree trunk, looking more like a squirrel than a cat as he made judicious use of his thrusters to sail between branches.

 _Cheater_ , Steve said. He was panting with the effort of the climb, but it didn’t affect his voice at all.

 _Jealous_ , Tony said, his voice filled with unmistakable laughter. _I’d offer to carry you, but you outweigh me by like ten or twelve times._

 _You’re just being lazy_ , Steve groused in reply.

 _Lazy is definitely one of my middle names,_ Tony agreed.

 _When are you two expecting your first litter?_ Riverstones broke in, sounding a bit annoyed at their banter while he was struggling to get up the incline.

When Steve slid back several lengths in shock over the question, Riverstone’s nipped at his legs. With a yelp, Steve bounded forward again. He put his head down and concentrated in getting up the hill, mulling over the heart-racing flash of almost panic he’d experienced in response to the question.

Already at the top of the hill and lounging on a fallen tree, Tony watched them climb. _Is that a thing here?_ He asked after a long moment. _Wolf-cat hybrids?_

Riverstones did not immediately reply, though Steve heard – or maybe felt – a sort of background humming that he interpreted as confusion, tinged slightly with suspicious.

 _Here in this area,_ Tony recovered ungracefully. _Where we’re from… definitely not a thing._

 _Indeed not,_ Riverstones said just as Steve made it the top of the hill, scrambling over the edge in a flurry of flailing limbs. Though Steve wanted to collapse on the ground and take a few seconds to breathe, he turned around to watch Riverstones make it up the last few lengths. The smaller dog got his front legs over the lip of the hill and sagged there. Steve grabbed him by the scruff and, despite Riverstone’s warning growls, helped haul him up the last stretch.

As soon as Riverstones’ chest was on level ground, Steve let him go. He pushed himself up until he had his back feet under him, and then sprawled out.

 _I’m not a pup_ , he said, voice seeming even lower and more gravelly than normal. _My name is The Sound of Dry Animal Bones Tumbling Over Riverstones in Times of Drought,_ he added, as if this would lend further weight to his claim. _I have sired nine litters._

Tony made a _yroawl_ ing noise. Though Steve couldn’t understand the words, if they were words at all, he interpreted it as, “Good for you, buddy.”

 _Congratulations?_ Steve offered uncertainly.

Riverstones huffed out a breath. _Never mind_ , he grumbled while Tony laughed.

~*~

The first moon had just passed its zenith, and the second was hot on its tail when they made it to the base of a cliff. Riverstones stopped, and made a production out of sitting himself down. He tipped his muzzle straight up to follow its smooth surface up and up… and up.

 _Not even the mice have made it to the top,_ Riverstones explained. _The birds have identified the cave entrance directly above us, but it is guarded by both magical and conventional means. The few attempts we have made to assault it have had disastrous consequences._

 _Magic. Great. I hate magic,_ Tony said, almost surprising himself with the acid in his voice. He looked over to see both of the canines with almost identical expressions of bemusement on their faces, though Steve’s was accompanied by an eye roll that was both more exasperated, and somehow fond.

 _You… hate magic?_ Riverstones asked, giving him a once over.

 _How dare you,_ Tony gasped. _This is science, and technology, and physics. None of that mystic, glow stick waving doodling._

Riverstones blinked. The great bushy white brows over his eyes drew together, and he tipped his head sideways. _I see,_ he said, though clearly he did not.

 _Can you find another entrance, Iron Man?_ Steve asked smoothly, managing to phrase the question like he was _not_ getting in between Tony and someone who needed a thorough re-education about the nature of the universe.

Tony decided to ignore the insinuation, and instead turned his attention to the cliff. He had been doing his best to explore the modified suit’s functions as they’d travelled, and had discovered that he could still talk (Meow?) at the suit, though it did not reply as his typical AI did. It was lonely in the suit without a comforting voice to chat with while he was problem solving, but he supposed that Jarvis hadn’t been able to come through with him.

 _Hey, do we have infrared, or x-ray vision, or super cat senses or something to sniff out a cave?_ Tony asked. He was aware of the dogs’ ears twitching in response to his words, but he wasn’t going to take the time to translate himself just so the local canine population could understand him talking to his suit.

There was a brief pause, as though the suit were considering the request, and then he was all at once assailed with scents. Overwhelming, a thousand different messages filtering in through the vents from the unique scents of his travelling companions, to dozens of piles of animal shit in various stages of decay, vegetable matter living and dead, and a dark, dank, musty scent that was what he imagined being trapped in a coffin would smell like.

“No sniffing!” he shouted, frantically scrabbling at the face plate as if he could drive all the scents away. All at once, the cacophony of scents ceased, making him feel like he’d lost his sense of smell altogether. “Looking,” Tony said firmly. “Seeing through the stupid rock to a tunnel.”

There was another pause, and then his HUD went dark. Just when he was going to start yelling at it again, he caught Steve out of the corner of his eye, glowing in muddy yellows and browns and blues, and then the rest of the world slowly resolved into the same. He backed up as far as the slope behind him would allow, and then started walking around the base of the cliff. Steve padded after him, though Riverstones just watched him with a palpable air of confusion as Tony slowly panned his gaze over the cliff.

Cutting through the background noise of the plant life took some negotiating with his new suit, but he finally got the sense of an empty place behind the rock. It was marginally warmer than the surrounding stone, and came close to the surface. Tony dismissed the enhanced vision and sat down to stare at the cliff. Close to the surface was somewhat relative. There were still several feet of solid rock between them and the potential entrance to the cave system.

Pushing up on his hind legs, he thumped his forepaws against the stone. “Please be a secret door,” he said as he awkwardly worked over the stones, occasionally rearing back to let his gauntleted paws clang on the stone.

Steve came after him, nose so close to the ground that he had to be inhaling about as much dirt as oxygen. After a moment of watching their antics, Riverstones joined them. They must have looked ridiculous – a cat pounding on solid rock while a pair of canines sniffed around his feet. Tony tried the repulsors on the stone and ended up flinging himself back several feet. He hissed at the rock automatically, but before he could decide on his next course of action, Steve let out an excited whine and started digging at the base of the cliff.

Tony got a faceful of dirt before he could move out of the way, but Steve didn’t even apologize. His tail wagged furiously as he dug, looking like nothing so much as a dog going after a bone. Tony got himself up the nearest tree to get out of the splash zone just as Riverstones joined Steve in digging. Together, the two of them kicked dirt at a mad pace, occasionally snapping at one another when they got in each other’s way. They were quickly buried up to the shoulder, Steve hopping over Riverstones at regular intervals so they could switch places while they widened the hole.

Taking a nap seemed like a better use of his time than just staring at dog butts while they frolicked in the dirt, but Tony forced himself to stay alert. He fiddled with the input/output controls until he could keep an ear on the air above, his nose out for any conniving rats, and his eyes on the dogs’ progress.

With a triumphant noise, Steve dove into the hole. Tony watched curiously as he tried to wiggle his way further into it, and belated turned on the recording feature. If they were ever able to get home, and if the footage came along with them, the Internet was going to need to see Captain Ameriwolf squirming into a hole like a dog trying to get under a fence. His big bushy tail swished behind him, and his feet kicked comically in the air as he wormed further in.

 _Maybe the much smaller creature with more flexible bones should go first?_ Riverstones suggested when Steve shoved himself out of the hole in a flurry of panicky whines and the scrape of his shield on the stones.

 _You spoil all my fun,_ Tony said when Steve just turned to glare at him over one shoulder.

_Did you record that?_

_What? No, why would I do something like that?_ Tony said with sweet innocence. Steve bared his teeth. Riverstones rolled his eyes.

 _In the hole, Cat,_ he ordered.

 _Pushy, pushy_ , Tony complained, but he jumped out of the tree to land nearly silently on the fluffed earth, and then moved over to investigate the massive hole. He could hear the soft whistle of air, which must have been what had gotten Steve so excited. A quick look with the infrared showed where the stream was coming from, so Tony eased himself down into the pit to investigate.

A hole just barely big enough for a cat was visible in the stone. He wasn’t sure how much he liked the idea of maybe getting stuck in the hole with only several million tons of rock on top of him, but they needed a way into that cave. He swallowed down his very rational and well-supported fear of caves, and darkness, and unknown depths, and then forged ahead.

It ended up being more of a tunnel than anything. It did narrow slightly when he was too far in to easily get himself back out, but the suit pressed in close around him, and he felt like his body was just squishing down to accommodate the smaller dimensions. Being in the tight space was less distressing than he expected it would be, and he was pulling himself up through a small hole into a corridor before he had time to get distressed.

The floor was smooth and even, obviously not naturally occurring, though he had a hard time getting an idea of the dimensions. It was pitch dark, and he was reluctant to turn the exterior lights on in case he’d come up in the middle of the rats’ burrow, and he found himself the center of a lot of unfriendly attention. Even with as stunning as his night vision was, even a cat couldn’t see in utter darkness.

Switching back to infrared, Tony crouched against the wall. He waited several tense seconds for any signs of motion, or flashes of heat in the darkness. When nothing presented itself, he turned around to examine the stone behind him. He started to hear Steve’s impatient whines within a few minutes, and then Riverstone’s grumbles as well, but he ignored them while he looked for anything that might open the door.

Getting onto his back feet again, he felt across the wall where a door was most likely to be, if there was one at all. Standing upright, he guessed that he was about as tall as the kitten-napping rat in the woods had been, so if there was any kind of lever it would most likely be –

His paw found a stone protruding from the otherwise smooth surface, and then the wall gave a shudder. It ground slowly open to reveal the two canines waiting eagerly at the entrance. Steve darted in so quickly that he nearly bowled Tony over, and Riverstones followed right on his heels. They both halted a few strides into the corridor, noses going into overdrive as they sniffed the air. After a moment, the door slid shut with a muffled.

A high-pitched series of squeaks echoed abruptly off the walls, giving Tony a better idea of how big the corridor had to be – big. They all went stock still, and Tony tried to track the sound. The clicking nails and the drag of a heavy tail came from around the corner. Tony had a bare moments warning from the heat of the rat’s nose before it turned toward them.

 _Incoming!_ He called, just as the rat let out an alarmed noise and squealed.

Tony didn’t have to be able to understand Ratlish to guess he was bellowing _Intruders!_ At the top of his rat lungs. He activated the suit’s external lights as he lunged forward in a great leap, but just missed the rat as he scampered out of the way. The three of them gave fast chase while the rat squeaked and shouted as loud as it could manage, staying just inches ahead of Tony’s flashing claws.

 _Stop thinking like a cat, Iron Man!_ Tony chastised himself. He flung out one paw to throw a repulsor blast at the retreating rat, which just barely missed, and then activated the jets. A flash of green light shot past him, but Tony didn’t have the time to investigate. The rat tumbled over itself as it took a corner too fast, nails scraping and skidding over the rock. Tony followed, using the opposite wall as a springboard.

Still just barely ahead of him, the rat burst through a curtain of darkness that gave the corridor the appearance of a dead end. Moving too fast to stop in time, Tony twisted to take the impact on his shoulder and left side, but passing through the curtain was effortlessly painless. He tumbled through the air, off balance by both the curtain and the sudden light.

By the time he righted himself, the two canines had caught up. They leaped through the curtain, Steve’s shield somehow hovering above his back like a flying saucer, and Riverstone’s teeth, eyes, and claws glowing brilliant green. The both skidded to a halt, and Tony thumped to the ground at Steve’s side.

The rat had lead them quite neatly into some kind of giant chamber lit with floating golden lights. Rats lined long stone tables, and the biggest rat of them all sat up on the dais, all staring at them in stunned silence.

Thousands, and thousands of rats.

Steve made a coughing noise that Tony guessed was meant to be a clearing of his throat. _We’ve come for the kittens. Turn them over peacefully, and we’ll have no problems._

At this announcement, dozens of cages behind the rat king’s throne that Tony hadn’t even noticed were filled with sudden motion and noise. Kittens cried for attention, calling for their mommies, begging for help. Tony took an automatic step forward, which seemed to break the rats’ stunned silence.

The Head Rat-oncho stood, bringing him up to a truly enormous height that Tony guessed was pretty close to six feet. He glowed a malevolent red, and then pointed a gnarled finger at them. As if they were one body, the thousands of rats turned to look at them. Their eyes took on the same sickly glow.

 _They’re ensorcelled,_ Riverstones said in obvious shock.

The Rat King let out a deep boom that needed no translation – _kill them!_

 _Get the controller!_ Riverstones shouted, jumping forward as great green vines of light exploded around him. He cut a wide swathe in the advancing rats, flinging their wiry bodies away indiscriminately, carving a path through the hall.

Steve’s shield flung out with a high pitch _fwang!_ , hit the stone floor, and mowed down an advancing wave. _Go, Tony!_

The rats were an unending wave, and he didn’t want to leave Steve alone to face the tide, but he could still hear the helpless cries of the kittens under all the clamor.

 _GO!_ Steve repeated.

Tony activated the thrusters. He shot into the air just as a great wall of rats rushed them from the side. He flung repulsor blasts into the mass, but it was like throwing pebbles into a tsunami. Green light flashed out to throw them back, but Tony couldn’t stay to see how the dog with mysterious talents handled the advance. He put on a burst of speed to get over the rats’ heads, flying for the raised dais, and the ruby glow of the controller rat.

He expected some kind of magic blast to fly out at him, but the rat just watched him, knobby hands held up like he was welcoming Tony in for a hug. He was kind a silly creature, a giant rat that stood on his back legs like a human, draped in odd bits of jewelry. The red was a nice color, Tony liked it.

Red. There was something about red….

He couldn’t see red. Tony tossed his head, looked down at himself, and realized that he’d landed on the dais at some point. The big rat loomed over him, the red glow (His eyes weren’t equipped to…) giving him the aspect of an avenging angel, terrible and beautiful… Tony could just… take a nap, bathe in the warmth, the red…

 _Iron Man!_ Some shouted. _Iron Man what are you doing?!_

Iron Man wore red. Red was a great look on Tony. It matched really well his skin tone.

 _What a strange cat you are,_ a sonorous voice said. _Such odd colors_.

 _Oh, I’m not a cat_ , Tony informed him cheerfully.

_Iron Man, we’re being overrun back here!_

Tony threw up a paw and fired a repulsor blast (blue, cold and bright) into the rat’s face. The strange blanket that had wrapped around his mind vanished. Tony let out a deep growl that ratcheted up into a hiss, and launched himself at the rat’s throat.

His claws found new homes in the rat’s thick skin, and he threw the faceplate back so he could sink his teeth into the rodent’s neck. The rat roared. It was a sound so un-rat-like, and so terrifying that Tony felt his fur standing on end. There was a great clamor of noise behind him, but Tony couldn’t spare any attention from just hanging on as the rat flailed and tried to pry him off. He tasted blood, hot and rich, and doubled down, ripping his head sideways in a quest for more.

Abruptly, the wiry hair of the rat dissolved. The tough skin seemed to melt under Tony’s tongue. Before he could process what was happening, a pair of hands (hands, not rat claws) reached up to grab him by in a crushing grip. He felt the armor plates compressing around his ribs while the other hand fought under Tony’s suit to get to his scruff.

In the next moment, Tony was flying through the air. He twisted, dizzyingly on four axes. He impacted hard with the wall, and crumpled down to the floor, still landing on all four feet for as much good as it did him. He felt the shock of landing shoot up his legs, and had to just lay still for a second to overcome the disorienting blow.

From his new vantage point, he could see confused rats milling around the room, Steve fighting through the throngs of their bodies. They were no longer attacking, but they didn’t seem keen to get out of Steve and Riverstones’ way either, staring dumbfounded at the two dogs whenever their attention could be focused at all.

On the dais, a man stood, naked to the skin save a tangle of grotesque jewelry. His face was a parody of human features, twisted and sharp, with a strange texture, and an odd brown colored head.

 _REDSKULL!_ Steve howled, charging across the floor.

Redskull took one look at the onrushing freight train of a few hundred pounds of canine fury, and turned to run. Green light soared over Steve’s back to hit the running man right on the ass. He stumbled forward, tried to regain his balance, but got Steve’s shield to the back of his legs before he could get more than a couple steps. He fell to one knee and Steve was on him in an instant.

Steve bore him to the floor in a chorus of truly nightmarish snarls and growls.

Riverstones started barking. He danced around Steve and the prone human trying to stave off Death’s snapping jaws. Tony fought to his feet, realizing that the dog – wizard dog? Canizard? Wizog? – was trying to get Steve to stop. Behind the great throne chair, the kittens were crying in piteous horror.

 _Steve!_ Tony croaked. He struggled to his feet and took a few woozy steps forward. The rats were no more willing to get out of his way than they had been for Steve and Riverstones. He cursed and lifted off again, setting for a drunken arch toward the dais. _Steve, the kids!_ He shouted as his equilibrium slowly reasserted itself.

“This is a stupid idea,” he said, but he dropped out of the air directly onto Steve’s back.

Startled, Steve whirled and bucked, trying to throw the threat off. Tony dug his claws in.

_STEVE!_

Steve stopped flinging himself around like a mechanical bull… _Tony?_

 _You’re a better role model… role wolf than this,_ Tony said, sagging against Steve’s warm neck. He really wanted to go home.

Steve jolted as if he hadn’t remembered the kittens, and then hung his head in shame. _You’re right_.

 _We need to get the kittens out of here,_ Riverstones said in a rush. _Quickly. As soon as the befuddlement wears off on those rats, they’re going to be angry. Talk to them, Cat._

Tony decided that he didn’t really like being called ‘cat,’ but they had bigger fish to fry. He slithered off Steve’s back to rush over to the stacks of cages. The kittens has been crammed in like furry sardines, hundreds of them huddled together and crying for their parents.

“We’re going to get you out of here,” Tony reassured them. A brave kitten in the nearest cage pressed forward and squeaked out a pitiful meow. She had obviously meowed herself hoarse, and the noise was just barely above a whisper. Tony grabbed the latch to the cage in his teeth while the kitten’s cries degenerated into a noise closer to clicking. He tugged.

Behind him, Redskull howled out something ugly and guttural. Tony spun around, but the man was still on his back, one of Steve’s massive paws planted on his chest. He pointed at Tony and babbled incoherently, eyes crazy, body vibrating with his rage. With a start, Tony realized that he was probably _speaking_ , maybe in English, or German, but to Tony it just sounded like a babble of angry sounds. He hissed at the man, who took no notice of him.

Steve snapped out a deafening bark that made Redskull cower briefly before sending him into another fit of meaningless howls.

 _Allow me to assist,_ Riverstones said smoothly.

Tony looked over to him and found a tunnel of green light stretching across the floor and disappearing through the curtain. He understood immediately that it was to funnel the kittens out of the caves so none of them tried to bolt down some dark hall. The rats had been shoved out of the tunnel’s path, but were starting to move with more confidence.

Turning back to the cage, Tony grabbed the lever again and yanked it hard, desperate to get the kittens out of the cages before the rats woke up from the spell. The lever clanged out of the housing, and Tony threw the door open.

“Come on, kids, jump down!” he urged. The girl who had come up to him hopped out readily, but the others stayed huddled in the back of the cage, shaking and terrified. If only he had hands. The girl huddled by his feet, reminding him of Nighteyes as she tried to get as close to him as possible.

 _Step back, Cat,_ Riverstones orders.

Tony turned to see the dog glowing green once again. He leaned down to pick the kitten up and trotted out of the way. The dog let out a series of three booming barks that echoed off the tall ceiling and made Tony’s ears hurt. Green glow raced forward to pry the latches out of their housings, and then slid into the cages.

Kittens came out by the dozens, some squirming in the grip of the green light, others hanging limply like they would when carried by an adult cat, and still others trying jump away. They were deposited in the tunnel, and then more kittens were brought down, and more yet. There had to be close to three hundred of them by the time all the cages had been emptied. Some of the kittens took off down the tunnel right away, but most of them stayed where they’d been set down, crying and huddled together.

 _What about Redskull?_ Steve asked when Riverstones turned for the tunnel.

Still holding the kitten in his jaws, Tony looked over to the hapless monster. He was staring at the escaping kittens with burning, hate filled eyes, mute now in the grips of what Tony recognized was obsession.

 _Leave him_ , Riverstones said contemptuously. When Steve barked out a protest, Riverstones just looked to the hoard of rats filling the hall. They had formed up into one mass, their eyes focused on Redskull with unnerving intensity.

Steve hesitated, as if unsure that even this monster deserved that kind of death, but when the rats rushed forward in one mass, he pushed away from Redskull’s body and bounded into the safety of the tunnel. The tunnel closed behind them, preventing any stray rats from following, but none of them seemed at all interested in the kittens, or their rescuers.

Tony carried his tiny burden out of the cave with Redskull’s shrieks following behind.

~*~

Even with Riverstones’ tunnel to keep the kittens in a group, herding that many terrified, tired, hungry, and traumatized kittens out of the caves took the rest of the night. The sun was well over the horizon by the time they got the last of them out, and even Steve’s stamina was nearing the breaking point. They took a much longer, but far gentler path down the hill, urging the exhausted kittens around the cliff, and down its shallower incline toward the village.

The tunnel built out in front of them as they moved, and closed off behind them, keeping any kittens from getting lost. A few of them learned that they could get a free ride by standing at the back of the tunnel and letting it push them forward. Steve had more than a dozen of the tiny furballs clinging to his back, Riverstones had his own share of little limpets, and Tony traded off carrying one kitten or the other every few minutes.

When the kittens stopped whining, he knew that they’d just about had it. He understood wanting to get them as far away from the cliff as possible, just as he had wanted to get the men of the 107th as far away from that Hydra base as quickly as he could, but more and more of the babies were laying down in heaps and letting the tunnel push them along.

Just when he was ready to demand that they stop to the let the kittens sleep, he saw a dark shape just over the next hill. As he watched, it resolved into the form of dozens of running animals, and dozens more behind them. Finally, he recognized the great form of the kangaroo, and realized that it was the villagers, and not just from Riverstones’ village, but other villages as well. Leading them was the familiar hulking gray form of Walker.

The tunnel widened out into a funnel as the villagers got closer, and then the leading edge opened up. Walker stopped at the edge of the green light, but adult cats darted right in, running for the exhausted babies. Some were joyfully and immediately reunited with their litters, but it was obvious that the priority was getting them somewhere safe. They could be sorted out to the proper parents later.

Steve laid down as soon as the last of the kittens had been dug out from their secure hammock of the underside of his shirt. The rest of the kittens were gathered off his back, but Steve stayed on his belly for a while. He set his head between his paws and just watched the commotion as kittens were loaded into the kangaroo’s pouch, carried by the scruff, or urged onto the backs of dogs of all shapes and sizes. Above them, birds cawed what sounded like encouragement.

Tony picked his way over and nudged unabashedly under Steve’s chin. He curled into a compact with his armored tail tucked around his nose, and promptly went to sleep. Riverstones joined them shortly after, lowering himself down slowly to the dirt and letting out a great sigh.

“We will need to do much hunting to get all of these little ones fed,” Riverstones said.

Steve’s brows furrowed. “How do you know you’re not hunting down your neighbor?” he asked. The question had occurred to him before, but he’d been so distracted by all the activity, he hadn’t thought to ask.

Riverstones gave him a worried look. “Can’t you tell an animal from a person?”

Steve grunted. He couldn’t, but he had a feeling it had something to do with his colors being ‘odd.’ They lay together in companionable silence for a while as the babies were all sorted out, and villagers started back down the road, eager to get the children to safe homes and full bellies. Walker, apparently reassured that all was well, gave Steve a regal bow of her head, and trotted off into the woods.

“You’re the Sorcerer Supreme, aren’t you? Walker said we’d find you on the coast,” Steve said after a long silence.

“Well, she wasn’t going to just tell you my name, now was she?” Riverstones said calmly. He gave Steve an intense stare. “And you are from the realm of the Two Legs.” He let his tongue flop out of his mouth in a broad smile. “I suppose you want to go back there.”

Steve bobbed his head.

“Are you sure? They’re so strange, and ugly. They smell weird.” He gagged.

Unable to help it, Steve laughed. The noise disturbed Tony’s rest, and he extended one back paw to shove at the underside of Steve’s jaw. Steve licked his exposed head, and Tony made a discontented noise as he tucked himself deeper into Steve’s fur.

“Your friend is lucky to have you,” Riverstones observed.

Steve looked down at Tony’s sleeping form. “I’m lucky to have him.”

~*~

They stayed several more days to help get the kittens sorted out. Tony turned out to be an effective fisherman, while Steve just enjoyed splashing around in the water and scaring all the trout. Every time Tony got wet and hissed at him, Steve splashed him some more just for the hell of it.

The kittens were sorted out, and most were returned to their parents. The ones that were left must have come from villages even further afield, and they were fostered out to grateful moms until their homes could be found.

Steve split his time between antagonizing Tony while he was sleeping in the sun, and playing with Riverstone’s puppies so the two adults could focus on the massive influx of new mouths. Walker showed up irregularly to leave an animal carcass at the village gates, and usually disappeared before anyone could so much as say thank you.

 _She just prefers to be alone,_ Moonlight had explained when asked. _Some do._

She didn’t seem to find it at all strange or distressing, so Steve let it go. At night, he slept on the heart with a rotating pile of puppies for company. Tony usually took the opportunity to wake him up at least twice in retaliation for his disturbed naps, but he normally settled down on top of Steve’s curled form by the middle of the night.

It wasn’t until the day they were set to leave that Steve realized how much he was going to miss it when they were back to their two-legged bodies. He didn’t imagine that Tony was going to want to curl up with him back at the Tower, or help him clean his face in the morning, or knead at his chest while they were falling asleep. For one insane moment he considered telling Riverstones that they didn’t want to leave after all. They obviously weren’t the first humans to wind up in this universe, or Riverstones wouldn’t have even known what a Two-Legs was, and Redskull could have survived the rat attack. For all he knew, dozens of human villains could be lurking in this peaceful animal world, causing problems. They could stay.

 _I can’t_ wait _to get my bed back,_ Tony said excitedly before Steve could give voice to the crazy suggestion. _My bots, my cars,_ cheeseburgers _, my god, I want a cheeseburger so badly._

Steve let the thought die. It wasn’t like he’d thought Tony would really agree. They sat down in the center of the village, and said their goodbyes. Dozens of tiny kittens clamored all over Tony, and one girl in particular shoved herself under his belly and crouched there like it was her rightful place. When Tony tried to move away, she followed without seeming to realize that he was trying get her back to her mom. He finally had to lift up on his back legs so her mom could grab her, and she cried as she was pulled away.

Steve said his own goodbyes Riverstones and Moonlight’s litter. He exchanged nose bumps with the adult dogs, wuffed out farewells to crowds of mice, and stood on his back legs to shake paws with the kangaroo. She was delighted by this, and sat back on her tail while she shook his paws vigorously.

  _Are you ready?_ Riverstones asked finally.

If they waited too much longer, they would probably be pulled into another celebratory meal, so Steve nodded. He sat down next to Tony, and they both watched as Riverstones closed his eyes and started to glow. The glow intensified all around him, and then expanded into a large circle.

On the other side of it, Stephen Strange stood with his hands up. His cloak ruffled up until it could perch on his hips like an irate mother berating them for missing dinner.

“There you two are!”  Strange said. His words seemed to come slowly, as if they had to pass through a sheet of water before being morphed into barks. Tony’s head twitched, and Steve wondered if maybe the words sounded like meows to him. “Universe number 213. You couldn’t have stayed a _little_ closer to home? Your friend Colonel Rhodes is nearly ready to tear my arms off it’s taken so long.”

“What about Loki?” Steve asked immediately, expecting that whatever magic let him hear Strange would work in reverse.

He cocked his head as if listening, and then nodded. “Captured, taken back to Asgard. Escaped three days later. The usual.”

“Typical,” Tony said with a huff of a sigh.

“You two ready to lose the fur?”

Tony stretched, and Steve waited for him to answer.

“I don’t know,” Tony mused. “Eighteen hours of sleep a day is pretty nice.”

The cloak fluttered out in an obviously gesture of irritation. Strange glared at them.

“Fine,” Tony said. He craned his head back. _Ready to go, you mangy canine?_

 _Whenever you are, you lousy cat,_ Steve replied fondly.

They stepped through the portal together.


End file.
